Tuesday, September 13, 2005

Blocked and Bullied

I want to bead but I'm just blocked! I get ideas and before I get to the point where I try them, I'm off in another direction. Idea completely forgotten. This too shall pass. I have some hope of getting my beading going again - a real desk to use the computer at where I can bead while I chat or read e-mail. Maybe.

It doesn't help that I had a pissing match with a jerk about how I run my e-mail list. In the end - my expecting him to follow the rules constituted a power/ego issue. He simply couldn't see that he was breaking rules and that is why his post was not allowed through. When I told him that a man would think it was about control and power, he countered by accusing me of having penis envy... Ya right. In the end, I asked him to stop e-mailing me, he informed me that he could do what ever he wanted whenever he wanted and I filed a grievance with AOL against him. He could not see that sending me nasty e-mails after I asked him to stop was harassment. Male Bully behavior just sucks anyway. Odd thing was that AOL was putting his e-mail in my spam folder. Maybe they were trying to tell me they had nothing but CRAP in them? LOL Never engage in a battle of wits with an unarmed person?

I also had a comment come from my site asking for a pattern that I designed that was not up but the inference was for it to be given. Why is it that there are beaders out there who want you to keep putting out new patterns but none of them expect to have to pay for them? They want us to stay in "business" with no income? Come on people! You will buy beads - you will buy books but come across a private designer you don’t want to pay them for their hard work? You would rather pay a huge publishing company for a book but not put dollars in the pocket of a designer directly??? This just doesn't make any sense to me. I would much rather buy a book or a pattern or a kit directly than to give a percentage to ANYONE else who didn't participate in the creative process.

Friday, September 02, 2005

Amazed and Confused

I run several bead lists. One to learn about beading, one to announce changes to my site, another for more advanced beaders among them.

For the learning list to be productive, most of the members need to participate. They are either there to learn or help others learn. This isn't a list to talk about your personal things - it's a bead list to learn beading on. It has to be give and take. In regard to my time that I use to keep the list going, I want it to be successful. I want people to share beading information. Share info on a new book. Share the new project you just made.

I went to the archives this morning and I looked at how excited we all were to have a list to discuss the mechanics of beading on. We need to have the ones who want to learn speak up and tell the ones who know what to help them with. The ones who know need to help the ones who want to learn. Anyone who doesn't participate is sort of doing nothing and gaining info but giving nothing in return. I thought that was pretty unfair. So I told the entire list that if you want to be here - you need to participate. I told them I knew it sounded rough but it was the bare bones of the situation. I simply don't feel it's fair for a big part of the membership to not give anything. Many people are on every bead list they can find and share nothing on any of them. They get the benefits and no one gets anything back from them.

So I'm amazed that people can't grasp the idea that for the list to work properly, we all have to put something into it. I give my time and I want it to work properly.

The part that confuses me is that people who are on other lists of mine left them as well. What's up with that? One in particular actually participates on the list, so I really don't know why she got her panties in a bunch, she was not at all who I directed my post to at all. So what if I'm upset with people who don't bother to participate on the list? What's it to anyone who does? Shouldn't they want to have something shared as well as do the sharing themselves?

I love beads but there are times when the people in the beading community amaze and confuse me.